Sunday, February 22, 2015
I'm Lila's mom
Tonight at family dinner my brother in law Joe was asking us if it ever hit us during the day what it means to be Lila's parent. He was talking about his week and how he was getting exasperated with a co worker when he said he had the thought, "I'm Lila's uncle," it changed his whole outlook and perspective. Quinn said that he had had similar situations where he could feel his temper starting to get the best of him and then he would think, "I'm Lila's dad" and it would change everything. Their conversation really stuck a cord and as I started to take a moment to really ponder what the extreme honor I had to be Lila's mom I thought to myself "I am Lila's mom", at once this peace and comfort started to go through me. In two days we find out if our IVF has worked and I am not very optimistic about what the results will be but I am Lila's mom. I am the mother of a beautiful, perfect little girl who chose me to be her protector. It made me feel strong. It made me feel like I was capable of being knocked down again. It made me realize that I can keep fighting and keep working because the most perfect being I know believes in me. She thinks I can do it, she has faith in me.