Decorating for Christmas

Ruby likes to hug and kiss her favorite ornaments. 

My moms friend made these amazing hand knitted socks for my kids. It is amazing to see all their names up there together. 

Tree shopping

I forgot to take any pictures at thanksgiving! But here is the family the day after with our annual tradition of Christmas tree shopping. 

The sweetest

On thanksgiving  we went to go visit lila. It was terribly cold, Quinn and  I told Ruby to stay in the car while we quickly went and said hello. These holidays are always so difficult. Quinn and I just sobbed by her grave. When we came back we got in the car and started to drive away, Ruby started to scream, "I want to see lila!" I kept telling her that we come back another day when it was warm, but she wouldn't have it. She kept screaming I want to say hi to Lila!, I want to say hi to lila! We finally had to turn around and Quinn ran her quickly to the grave. Ruby kissed her and told her how much she loved her. It was the sweetest and so good for this mama heart 

I got mommy's eye stuff

Lilas Christmas tree

We set up Lilas Christmas tree at the cemetery. Last year we got so many great ornaments and we hope that we get some more to add to her collection this year. It's such a wonderful way to remember her during the holidays which can be so hard without her. I loved to be with Lila under the Christmas tree and watching the twinkling lights. There's nothing more peaceful. I hope she likes her tree at the cemetery

One month!!!

This handsome boy is one month!! It breaks my heart. I want time to slow down. 

Young boys should never be sent to bed.  They always wake up a day older, and then before you know it they're grown 

J M Barrie 

Park city.

It's the end of an era. My parents bought timeshares up in Park city when I was in high school and I've had so many wonderful memories up here. From BBQs, to watching the Fourth of July parade on Main Street and fireworks, swimming, taking dates up, sleepovers with friends, walking Main Street, shopping, staying up late talking, the one time Mikey stole all my friends phones and took pictures of himself and friends , bringing all my "girls" up, watching Quinn dance with The drunk crowd during street concerts, it had been amazing. 

They sold them this year and tonight was our last swim. I will really miss this place. Thank you so much for the memories mom and dad

So much love

I have been so touched by all the love that we have received after Edison was born. Lots of meals, gifts and visits came our way. It means so much to us. 

My activity day girls made us this gorgeous quilt. It has the girls names stitched into it. Such a treasure. We are truly blessed with dear friends and support. 

I see you

What I talk about

Took this quiz on Facebook today. No surprise what I talk about most : ) 

Ruby and her siblings

Ruby is starting to warm to Eddie. She  asks to hold him and she will bring him his binky. There is hope! Maybe these two will actually be friends some day. It melts my heart to see these two together.  I just love them to pieces. 

I have been starting to wonder if Ruby is truly seeing Lila. The other day she ran from room to room giggling and yelling "where are you Lila?" Every morning she tells me dreamt about Lila and Jesus and just yesterday she pointed to the ceiling and said "Lila had to go" Quinn said "was she just here?" And Ruby said "yes." She talks about her in normal conversation and tells me how pretty her dress is and cute she is. At first I thought it was just in reaction to us talking about her but now I wonder how much Lila is in our home and playing with her sister. I pray that that special relationship can last. 

Ruby running as fast as she can to Lila at the cemetery. She always yells, "where are you Lila!? Oh there you are! So good to see you! Love you! " it's the sweetest 

First bath together

Ruby is starting to accept her baby brother a little bit more. She actually was excited that Edison took a bath with her. 

First laugh

Quinns sister was nice enough to talk Ruby all day for me which meant a good nap, shower and feeling like a new woman. When she brought Ruby back I was telling her how grateful I was. It's a hard thing to be stuck at home and covered in baby spit up. To which Eddie have a huge smile and a laugh to go along with it. Such a wonderful moment. Love this kid  

First social smile?

A couple of days ago Eddie, Quinn and I were snuggling and Eddie looked right at me and gave a huge smile. I know it's early but I swear this wasn't a sleepy smile, maybe gas, but it was adorable. He also gives little smiles when I kiss his cheeks. We are pretty smitten 

Eddie.

Halloween!!!

Halloween 2015 was a success! Ruby wore Lilas sleeping beauty costume. It is the last year for Lila costumes. Bittersweet on so many levels. But it was incredibly fun to watch Ruby love trick or treating as much as she did.