Wednesday, April 27, 2011

ICU regulars

On the C pap machine. Definitely not a fan. She is such a brave soul. She was gagging and gulping for air, yet intermittently still giving me smiles.

Who you calling chubby??!!

My beautiful baby! What can I say? We are back in the ICU. Last night we were told that she has either a kidney infection or maybe heart failure.... um.... those are big differences.
Turns out she does have a kidney infection, but they are still concerned with her heart. She had an echo today and the heart looks good. The left ventricle is working harder than the right, not horrible news though and the valve to the outside of her body is a bit tight. They gave her meds to help that and hopefully it will resolve itself. They said that she has mild decreased heart function. We may have to take heart medication to regulate heartbeats and rates for an unspecified time. A follow up with cardio is needed in a few months. Just throw them into the mix, we really don't have enough specialists or doctors : )
My gorgeous nine month old (today) is such a trooper. She stayed up till two in the morning last night on high flow oxygen giving me smiles and sly looks from under her ridiculously long eyelashes.
I have been starting to get the feeling that this little angel may not be with us for very long. -Quinn does not feel the same.- I am trying to take advantage of the time we have with her. For every little smile and laugh and for periods of easy breathing and comfort. My heart sings every time it seems like she is looking at me and just melts when it is followed by a smile. I love how she will put her hand out to touch your face if you lay it by her. I don't know if it intentional but I would like to think so. I Love how she grabs her daddy's nose and pulls as hard as she can, and how she now thinks her sneezes are hilarious. I am absolutely smitten (as if you couldn't tell from this blog) and feel blessed for every moment, even if it is in the ICU.

11 comments:

Em said...

Kristi -
((HUGS)) to you. I know those virtual ones aren't as cool as real ones. She is beautiful. I can't get over her eyelashes or her pouty lips. You guys are in my prayers.

Bart and Michelle said...

I didn't know it was a c pap she was on! Carley was on that for the first week of her life. :( She is stunning! Such an "angel baby." ;) love you guys. xoxo

Barb @ getupandplay said...

She is so beautiful. Look at her gorgeous skin!! I hope that Quinn is right and that this is just the rough start to her otherwise wonderful life. Love you three.

nikki said...

I cannot believe that I was holding her just hours before she was admitted again. I am so sorry you are back up there. I know how hard it is to relax, sleep or live your life when you are stuck in a hospital room. Hopefully things will start looking better and better and you will be out of there soon. We'll celebrate with breakfast again!!!

Robbie and Margot said...

What a beautiful trooper you have! I love chubby babies. You and your family are in our prayers. Lila has touched so many lives in her 9 months here and she will continue to make people better and touch their hearts. You are one great (and smitten) mom.

Sandie-Matthew's Mom said...

I love how you are able to openly pour out your heart with the painful honest emotions you are feeling and yet at the same time, despite those feelings, are also able to soar above them and allow your spirit to be full of the lovely sweetness of Lila.

I am praying for Lila, for you and Quinn, for wisdom and guidance for her doctors and for Lila's healing.

Daphne A. Quist said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Daphne A. Quist said...

yeah, I couldn't spell :) What a trooper! I just read up on all your sweet blogs! You guys are amazing! Glad we have been able to hang out this past week...hopefully you weren't too tired of us! But, always in our prayers! I'm always just amazed that you are so intune with her and know when things aren't right! Love!

Kelli said...

Love you,Q & Little Miss more than I could ever say. Couldn't sleep last night... still thinking of her constantly!

Steve and Liz Evans said...

OH my its crazy how much has happened the past week. Kris I am so sorry you are up there again. I shed a tear when you wrote that you had a feeling she may not be with you for long... I hope that is not the case. Kris I'm sorry Lila has had such hardships. She is such a gorgeous girl!!!! We love you guys!

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